Mike Mussina, who sees a villain and an excuse around every corner, now says that running bases is the newest form of evil in the big leagues.
Mussina’s teammate, Chien-Ming Wang, partially tore a tendon in his right foot on Sunday in a 13-0 win over interleague rival Houston. The injury, sustained as Wang was running the bases, will put him on the shelf until September.
Mussina had all the answers after the game, as usual:
“We don’t hit, we don’t run the bases,” Mussina said. “You get four or five at-bats a year at most, and if you happen to get on base once or twice, you never know. We run in straight lines most of the time. Turning corners, you just don’t do that.”
Yeah, that’s right…turning corners is the new crazy. Let’s put it in the XGames. Sample broadcast moment:
Play-by-play analyst: Well, here comes big Kenny Popson chugging into third. He can either play it safe and keep running straight into the dugout. Or, he can roll the dice and bend his way towards home plate. Whaddya think he’ll do, Bobby?
Color commentator: I’m not sure, but I can hardly look. That corner of the diamond has seen an abundance of breakdowns over the years. The strain on an athlete’s musculature is intense, and it’s clear that over the past decade or so these players have been built for speed, not soundness.
Play by play analyst: Good point, Bobby. Today, fifty percent of the fans are here to see a good game; the other fifty percent are here to see an accident. You can literally see those fans on the edges of their seats every time one of those pitchers enters the competition.
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